| Every time I have to crank my AC up to max in order to be a good host, Steve Harvey shows up to steal my thunder. |
   |
| Every time Steve Harvey shows up to steal my thunder, on the exactly opposite point on the surface of Earth the meeting of all world leaders with cats is held. |
MAL quote button: Firefox addon | Chrome extension |
| Every time on the exactly opposite point on the surface of Earth the meeting of all world leaders with cats is held, I regret choosing to ally myself with penguins! |
  cryptic and Squab |
| Every time I regret choosing to ally myself with penguins, I ally myself with polar bears. |
| Every time I ally myself with polar bears, the Fire Nation attacks. |
|
| Every time I retaliate by throwing water, a pack of stray cats madly chases me to the end of the world. |
|
| Every time a pack of stray cats madly chases me to the end of the world, I get a ton of catnip to keep the cats distracted. |
| Every time I get a ton of catnip to keep the cats distracted, I end up becoming queen of the kitties. |
| cryptic and Squab |
| Every time I become queen of the kitties, I become a gorgeous cat girl! |
~Saeryen~Cure Cantata~ Invoke love, invoke hope, please heal everything! |
| Every time I become a gorgeous cat girl, I look for mice to kill. |
| Every time I look for mice to kill, I get ushered into Disneyland |
| cryptic and Squab |
| Every time I have a fun day on the roller coasters, someone's vomit splats on my face. |
|
| Every time someone's vomit splats on my face, I end up having to make a trip to the emergency room. |
| Every time I end up having to make a trip to the emergency room, a new condition gets named after my sickness. |
| cryptic and Squab |
| Every time a new condition gets named after my sickness, I get embarrassed and have to change my name. |
| Away from the things of man, my love, away from the things of man. |
| Every time I get embarrassed and have to change my name, I pick a name at random to change it to. |
| Every time I pick a name at random to change it to, it results to "Randall Dominick". |
|
| Every time I get the results to "Randall Dominick", I try to figure out how I got the name "Randall Dominick". |
| And another bump. Every time I try to figure out how I got the name "Randall Dominick", I decide to mess with the random name generator to make sure that name never pops up again. |
| Every time I decide to mess with the random name generator to make sure that name never pops up again, a pop-up ad tells me that I "won $1,000,000" and to click on it. |
|
| Every time I close the tab and check for viruses, my PC finds all of my porn. |
|
| Every time my PC finds all of my porn, I reset my PC only to get a ransomware message. |
| Every time I reset my PC only to get a ransomware message, I call for the aid of Liam Neeson. |
|
| Every time I call for the aid of Liam Neeson, I undergo Jedi training under Qui-Gon Jinn. |
| Every time I undergo Jedi training under Qui-Gon Jinn, I throw a baby Yoda around. |
|
| Every time I throw a baby Yoda around, I head towards the dark side to do Palpatine's dirty deeds. |
| Every time I head towards the dark side to do Palpatine's dirty deeds, I clean the high grounds. |
|
| Every time i clear the high grounds Trump strikes me with another tariff |
MAL quote button: Firefox addon | Chrome extension |
| Every time Trump strikes me with another tariff, he claims that he didn't and that it was just my imagination. |
|
| Every time Trump claims that he didn't and that it was just my imagination, I watch Fox News to see what the logic behind that claim is. |
| Every time i watch Fox News, i'm like: "oh... i thought it was a channel with various news about foxes"... and head to the forest |
MAL quote button: Firefox addon | Chrome extension |
| Every time i'm like: "oh... i thought it was a channel with various news about foxes"... and head to the forest, I end up getting stuck in a bear trap. |
| cryptic and Squab |
| Every time I get stuck in a bear trap, an actual bear helps me out of it |
~Saeryen~Cure Cantata~ Invoke love, invoke hope, please heal everything! |
| Every time an actual bear helps me out when I get stuck in a bear trap, I ask the bear to take down poachers. |
| BUMP Every time I ask a bear to take down poachers, I end up having to care for that bear's cubs. |
| Every time I end up having to care for that bear's cubs, I get paid $2 per hour for babysitting. |
|
| Every time I get paid $2 per hour for babysitting, I ask for a pay raise. |
| Every time I ask for a pay raise, I get an instant indefinite vacation. |
|
| Every time I get an instant indefinite vacation, I end up finding a second job to work while on indefinite vacation. |
| And a BUMP Every time I end up finding a second job to work while on indefinite vacation, I look for a third job in case the second job doesn't work out. |
| Every time I look for a third job in case the second job doesn't work out, the fourth job comes lurking around, peeking from a dark alley. |
|
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